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2003-02-01 - 9:42 p.m. It's 5 till. Five more minutes until she has to go home. Clocks out, notices the time she has so far & leaves. It's cold out. She checks her cell phone to see if she has any missed calls. None. Unlocks the door, gets in & sits there. She looks out the window & stares @ the people leaving. Watches for a moment then starts the car. Music blares through the speakers. She forgot to turn it off when she turned off the car. On the way home she listens to slow, soft music. John Mayer. Portishead. Guster. She sings along to the parts she knows. Rewinds the parts she likes. She pulls into her driveway. Dreads going inside. She wants to be alone. She doesn't want any questions. No t.v. No talking. She goes in, puts all of her stuff down, & heads to the back, ignoring "How was your day?" She turns on the bath. Undresses. She forgot her towel. She runs into the hall to the linen closet & back into the bathroom. Gets in the water. It's hot. Perfect. Leans back, sighs, & releases everything. Her face becomes wet. But not from the bath water. She lets it all out. All of the things that keep her from going forward. All of the feelings & regrets & let-downs flow out of her eyes & down her chin. She hope no one hears her. 3 nights in a row & they might think something was wrong.
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